I was thinking over the last few days about all of the worry and thoughts that race through our minds. Have you ever been sitting there relaxing in a chair peacefully and then a thought or worry comes from left field you literally have to get up and walk it off. It used to happen to me me from time to time a couple of years ago. I was also able to happen to me while being in the midst of a gethering of some sort.  For me, it was usually based in business and family related issues.  It all stems from scheduling issues and trying to juggle work schedule with my wife and kids. On top of that my wife and I were helping with the care of her mom and dad. So, things were so busy. I could be in a chair one moment relaxing and a troubling thought or worry based emotion would throw me off the chair like a top. I would some times get out of the chair and try to walk it off. You also cannot run from your mind as I came to learn. These events would essentially make my brain freeze like an overload.( I know we all have them) I needed to get a grip on what was going on!  I think doing too much sometimes makes us feel good and successful. But in hein sight If back in that day I had been more rooted in God and was not trying to be all to everybody and save everbody that it would have been a healthier thing for myself and others. We need to trust in God. If, we are doing things from the heart then God is in it with us. But, we need to know his word, the bible before we can be successful. I was in so much personal pain and nobody really knew what was going on inside of me .Remember I was the face of an A personality. Everything was fine outwardly but inside I was burning out, I was mastering my ship onto the rocks. My drug of choice was food. it became my personal joke. The first one at the buffet table I would laugh but it really was not funny to me, it was shame with a laugh attached to it.

During my healing with this cancer illness and combined with writings I had done for my church. A  calling that I received from God  to sound a horn of a warning to the church and later an email chain from God to his people to turn back to him they were called love letters from God. It was also back at that time that I  began to be enlightened through the Spirit and learned more about who I am the good and the bad aspects.  I have to share it all in this blog as I said before this is my chance to tell God’s story of victory not just for me but for eachone of us personally. Some of the stuff that will come out with blog  is just so fantastic and  it is what it is, the glory of God.You see prior to 2012 and the onset of this illness I was under the wrong understanding of what helping others is all about. I did not realize what I was doing at the time but it was hurtful to myself, my family and yes even to those I thought I was helping.

I  came to realize after many years and once I began to write in the Holy Spirit that I cannot save anyone including myself. Jesus saves us. We are called to be Jesus to oneanother. We need to pray for eachother, support etc, but we also have to give everyone the diginity of their own decisions. We can show a way if asked to help someone  but cannot always drive them there. It is their free will choice. God knows where they are truely at, far better than we do.

God speaks of helping in one of his parables that you can show a man how to fish, but we are not required to feed them forever, meaning that he does want us to help and support them  but we cannot carry them forever. If they are not handicapped and are capable of course. They will never learn to find who they are in God for themselves. God gives everyone very special gifts of their own. Their is so much diginty that a person derives in taking on their destiny and seeing what God has in store for them! While I was playing God with these people they were carried and did not learn, I was handicapping them with love and assistance. It was when I hit the wall, and realized I could not do anymore that they were forced to get up and get on and find their way. My mom and dad would simply say to me you are doing too much! And, it was true, I was.  My wife was trying to stop me but again, me being me I had to learn for myself, I  needed to learn and  be humbled. What I did was done out of love but it was not done with the right understanding of God’s teaching. It also depleated me , exhausted my wife and made life messy.

My wife and I recently had the pleasure of having lunch with  very dear friends, our friend said that she kind of had to retreat from everyone but her family and husband. She was spent at the moment and needed to recharge. She too is a doer, and really tries to help out everyone. They have hearts of gold. So, God Bless them.

I had so many people as I said before in another writing say that I needed to tell this story.  Someone I was talking to a few months ago said Dan it can be a taxing process. So becareful you do not give too much of yourself up in the process. Hearing my friends the other day tell me of their need to slow it down, I understand it and see that what I have to share is my responcibility to help others but they are in fact work. I believe that is what God has ordained for me in this moment so if they do not come everyday they will come in God’s time, for God’s glory.

Well, back to the point 🙂

Like the old saying goes in every life some rain must fall. Today it is pouring out and I woke up happy to see it. Rain cleans and washes the enviornment and gives our plants grass trees and watershed water that is needed to keep things in balance.

I, like all of you need to be replenished by the rain in our lives, Just as Jesus was baptised in the river Jordan by John the Babtist . I too was babtised as a child in my parish at that time of St. Agnes in Arlington. We are one with Jesus.

About 10 or 12 years ago, I attended a meeting of the St Frances DeSalles Society at one of our friends homes. One of the teachings was to everyday when we shower to consider the water  to be a reminder of our baptism. I rededicate myself during that time to God and the HolySpirit everday in prayer that I say yes to do their will to the best of my ability.

With brotherly love,

Danny

Healing Rain

Michael W. Smith