i have been saying for the last 5 years through prayer that this the time of Miracles. Miracles can be big or small many are un noticed. The world is getting darker by the day. And God is revealing himself through signs and wonders this video was captures by a man in South Carolina. He said he felt it was a direct answer to prayers where he was struggling with his faith. He was struggling with it all.
Everyday, I keep my eyes , ears, and my prayers focused on one thing the good ness of God and the beauty often hidden from my sight. Well, today was no different. Last evening was beautiful my youngest daughter Rachael worked all day she went food shopping and picked up her boyfriend who I very much consider to be another son from the train station.Austin is currently attending college in Boston she and Austin made a dinner side by side in the kitchen. It was a family dinner so all of my children were here. They made vegan tacos that were delicious. My son brought over vanilla bean cupcakes that my daughter Stacy had made and gave him so it was a great night eating and sharing.
I watched part of the 50th anniversary of Charlie Browns show The Great Pumpkin and a few minutes of the toy story Halloween show because it reminded me of simpler days with my children being younger. I live in the past at times because it was a simpler time certainly simpler than my days are now.They were times that I have never taken for granted nor will I ever forget those days of joy are in my heart, and deeply embedded in my soul. Those memories are eternally mine.
This morning I was tired and actually came down to have breakfast at around 10:00 Everyone was up and about and my wife had long since left for work.
I was sitting in my chair and my daughter Rachael had to have all four of her impacted wisdom teeth out today and for the first time I was unable to go with her generally speaking my wife or I always accompanied our kids to all appointments like this. Well, I was sitting in my chair here and the phone rang. It was the specialty pharmacy that delivers my chemo therapy drugs setting up the delivery of my next round. I got speaking to the gentleman and soon understood that this man was a message for my day. It was like talking to myself on so many levels. Meanwhile both my daughters and my daughters boyfriend Austin exited the house. Before I knew it I began to feel badly that I was not able to go but was so happy that God had Austin here to do what I could not.
So, I sat in my chair. And spoke to my new friend Bob at the pharmacy and the front door opened and in came Rachy and Austin they had already been to the oral surgeon and the pharmacy.Rachael was how you would expect her to be from the Meds. weepy, Austin with his soft spoken nature just tended to her needs quietly he was reading the the Dr.’s directives and was getting her getting her some soup so se would not get sick from the medication. Rachael ate and starting her Meds. Austin then grabbed a bag of peas out of the freezer and wrapped it in a towel for her to use. He was up and down the staircase getting her settled next he came down and got Jerry the wonder pug and up he went to bring the pup to cuddle with Rachael 👍😀❌⭕️❤️. She loves that pug so much it is her baby. I tell her all the time that Austin is using her to get to Jerry. I said that Jerry is technically Austins first dog. Lol
The bottom line is this. I have prayed by my kids beds when they were little as did my wife that our kids would be happy and would be loved. My wife and I have I placed them in the loving hands and heart heart of My blessed Mother and Jesus Christ.
What that has done is no small thing. God granted beyond our wildest imagination true loves for each of our kids were we as parents would have that peice of mind.
Stacy ended with another wonderful man named Chris Cucinotto. Whom she wed in June of 2015. He is another son to us and his family is simply and extension of ours
My son Dan met his wife Andrea and they now are now wed . I tell her she is now my fourth daughter. And in my heart she is. Her parents and her sister are wonderful too so one again the family stretched out a bit more.
Rachael and Austin met at a Cathoilc Retreat Center that we belong to and became involved with the teen retreats there. They trained and worked many weekends with teens who were on their own individual journeys of faith.
Last, but not least.
My daughter Rebecca, Becky or as I call her Becky Boo, She has been dating her boyfriend Leopold Leo for the last 3 years everyone loves him.
Each one of my children have someone that only God could have matched with such precision. That’s not that my kids did not meet others but they clearly were not the right ones. I always said to my wife if we had those feeling lets just point out the different things that we see and let them look themselves. They need to have the dignity of their own decisions. When each one of my kids met their current partners it was just natural. Their was no drama. So, per usual I am grateful to God for this part of my life being settled and not turbulent.
yes, everyday is not easy but the stuff that really matters in life we have in huge amounts. We have, life,love, our family, a comfortable home food, and a general sense of peace and harmony which is rooted in one thing faith.
I came upon upon this song today after prayer and it totally sums up this day and all of the others that I am experiencing.
So, this day Graditude is what life is all about. Today I am so grateful to God for my children’s significant others and to the parents / grandparents who raised. Them Particularly today Eillen and Brian Austin mom and dad.
God Bless You All, Be grateful. Amen.❌❤️⭕️👍👍👍😀❤️❤️
my low energy is still an issues to me for instance. The effect of the phytigue that I am feeling is that I am home 99.9percentof the day. I go out for medical appointments etc and I managed to get a ride to see my dad, which was awesome.
I was out this week with my son to get a tux for his wedding. My son and daughter in law we actually wed in May of this summer at Andreas parish church immaculate Conception in Newburyport. Because at that time I had just had my second terminal cancer diagnosis my son Dan and Andrea wanted to make sure I would be there for their wedding day. Which, I really appreciated. They had their scheduled date of Oct 15 2016 invitations were sent out and responded to as well as the vendors set up etc,
Well, her parents were kind enough to to allow the May ceremony to move forward despite the October date. Etc.that was a beautiful marriage and vow ceremony.
This Saturday was the full wedding and vows, mass precious body and blood as well. To me the church ceremony is the most important peice of the day. The rest the gathering, food , dancing etc serve as a bonding opportunity for the families to unite together as a new family larger and more understanding of one another.
It could not have been anymore.beautifhul. this past Saturday as our families and friends joined the in renewing this vows. The reception that the planned was beautiful, food venue and its locale only one block down the road from the Church the mission oak Grill.
Today, I had my scan and it was great. Unchanged from my last scan in August.
Which means that my protocol is current working. I still have cancer it is still considered terminal because it’s not gone and Glio is not a curable cancer. I trust in God alone. Either here or there he has me.
i. Have had a little issue with the device that I blog on hence the delay in postings.
Everything in Dannys world remains the same no marked improvement in my mobility, or energy level as yet but I do remain hopeful.
I did did actually go to the Y once this week after not having gone since my Surgery April 27. It was good to be there and yet I felt somehow removed from the situation the people who attended the Live Strong program were not there. I saw my friend Dan one of the Livestrong trainers there which I really enjoyed seeing.
Please Keep Leslie in your prayers, Tim and their lovely daughter. Tim informed me a short while ago that Leslie’s journeys and battle with Glio is nearing its end.
This is a song that I just shared with him. It is exactly how I feel about death. Jesus did all the heavy lifting and dragging of the cross and dyeing on the cross for our sins so that death would not be eternal. So, when we leave this Earth and life we are truly just going home. My mom loved this song and I found this version. So, to Leslie Timand their lovely daughter
Also, for all of my friends that I have lost to Cancer etc over the last year or so may their families be comforted as well.
Teddy A. Jack G M
Anne K.
Vince Jeanne D
Maria C.
Bryan w.
Paul S.
Donna C.
Donna S
lets pray together, and believe in what Gods promise is Amen.
love, Danny I would like to point out one thing on this song that may not make sense to you unless your Roman Catholic. Mary our Most Blessed Mary is called the Morningstar. She is our Heavenly Mother. We in the Catholic Church do note worship Mary what we do is adore and venerate her because she was chosen above all other women to conceive through the Holy Spiritthe only Divine being to ever live. His purpose was to make eperations for man kinds sin so that death would not be eternal but that we would be able to be reunited with God through relationship to Jesus Christ my savior and my brother Amen.
So, my Blessed Mother is my prayer partner and I know when God calls me she will guide me to where I desire and want to be.
i spoke to a dear friend today. I had not heard from here in a little bit and thought I would drop a dime.Donna has COPD Emphysea and is now once again battling lung cancer. This is her second time around. We had a very nice conversation and I offered for my wife and I to come and get her for church. She no longer drives and her children are not handy. I was reminded while talking to her that she and I both could have it much worse than we do. I just said Donna, I miss my old life so much but, I I then said Donna, I have no right to feel that way. There are others who have never walked, worked ,married, had children and been capable of getting out of their special wheel chairs etc. wasn’t I blessed to have had 50 years of good health and a very very full life.
So, please pray for Donna, for my friend Trish from the Y who is mourning the loss of her mom. For all of us here on planet Earth, we need to keep our chins us especially when life gets difficult. We need to love and support and spread hope and joy no matter what.
I love this time of year because it is so refreshing and it ushers us into the Advent and Christmas Seasons. Christmas to me represents the light and hope of Christ and the slow The snow represents the purity of Mary and Christs Divine Innocense.
Thanks and God bless Danny
So, today it was my destinct honor to speak with Donna and she said Dan thx for calling it makes me feel so much better.
i was up at 4:00am and got ready for my ride into my Dr’appointment and left my
homeat 5:30 am with my brother to get as at Dana Farber by 6:30 I had my blood draw @ that time , my meeting with Dr. Reardon and finally, I had my treatment of Ivastin and then we headed home I was home by 10:00 am so I love getting in early. The hospitals and doctors are on time because I am first so I get in and out no traffic etc.
I am feeling extremely well. I am just exhausted aside from that I have no complaints. Gods good that’s for sure.
please continue to pray for Teddy A. And Leslie and Tim R and family. Thankyou very much and God Bless you 😀👍🙏
Danny😀❌⭕️❤️
On on my way home with my brother this song came on and I thought of my Aunt/ God Mother who passed away just over 3 months ago. After my mother passed away in Aug of 2013 , my God mother called me and said she wanted to stay close to me particularly since my mom was gone.We both missed my mom so much. My aunt and mom relied on eachother also for support eerily, they both suffered from the same disease and had very similar journeys. My mom and aunt talked daily.
While I was at Dana Farber I was looking at all of the faces of cancer patients and the effects has had on their bodies. One constant was the warmth they shared with one anothereye contact, a warm mile and a kind word. . There were no victims there just people living in hope and trying to lift one another up. It is beautiful when you realize what you are witnessing. It is very uplifting.
i cannot say enough about how much I love Dana Farber, my Dr. And all of the staff they are amazingly awesome at their care and their connection with their patients well, we were laughing because, I was discovered to have low T. The doctor asked if I had been using it the medication prescribed months ago and I said no. I read the side effects and it mentioned a possibility of getting man boobs lol. I said I have been through enough don’t want a bra next. Janet woulnot like that and we laughed so it was decided that I would begin using it for the month to see if my energy rebounds at all. The low T was a good finding for me for my general health too. So, I came home and applied my first dose to my arm on my way out of the exam room I said Doctor if I return in 1 month with a double D cup I will not be happy. He had his nurse walked out laughing. I look at it this way smart people who work in a stressful and often times sad line of work need a little levity in their day. And my sense of humor is such that if there is gutter in front of me I will step into and make a laugh out of something. We are the salt and light. I love them and hope they kept chuckling for a while after I left. Life is too short that’s for sure. Again, here is the song that reminded me of my aunt. She loved Neil Diamond.
She he was a lovely very hard working married mother of 5 children and also worked at a hospital for a number of years to help provide for the family too. She was strict, loving very fussy on how things we kept and she valued a dollar.
I miss her very much. Mainly her voice she and my moms voices had a similar tonal quality. So, when she called to talk to me, support me it was a little bit like talking to my mom which was very comforting
For my aunt Jeanne.
Please continue to pray for Jean, her husband Guy and their children who miss her so very much. Thankyou.
Saturday was fun day I missed church in the afternoon because my wife , one of my brothers and his wife Nancy along with my sister Donnaand her husband Chris converged on the Riley homestead here and took us to woodmans for lunch and we then went and took the Essex River cruise it took and out 1.5 hours on the boat and the weather could not have been better we then stopped because the ladies wanted ice cream. Our last stop was a spot in Rckport to watch the sunset. It was so beautiful. Yesterday was a very nice day. I was grateful for every moment and thanked God many many times during silent words of prayer.
For or my family and friends who have helped to transform our days to ones of beauty through words, prayers and deeds.
I have over the years seen so many people do things that looked irrational to me. Many ended up making bad choices. I understand now to a certain degree that people are looking for one thing happiness.Hapiness can certainly be elusive because life changes on a dime and when emotions ae involved you sometimes just what to get the heck out and escape.
Fortunately for me, I have seen this many times over the years friends, clients who have lived this. That is why when I began to get restless a while ago, I was able to attach my emotion to this situation. And say nope not going there.
I had had an older neighbor years ago that the grass was always greener somewhere else so they sold their home of over 30 years and moved from their home in Arlington and moved to Florida, they were retired and just wanted to get a fresh start from whatever. Well 5-6 years later they hated Florida they missed their friends, and changes in the Seasons. Florida was very transient and friends were made an lost. They were trying t sell their home and we’re losing so much value in Florida for whatever reason meanwhile Arlington was booming along with the Northeast region here.
They came back to find out that their old home was on the market and they could not afford to re purchase it. They were broken hearted. They rented an apartment in Arlington heights for a fortune and then started to fix up the place it was pretty run down. But, she kept here homes beautiful so she was treating it like her very own home. Here husband went to wrk once again in a hardware store locally. My parents and family felt so badly.
In in another case,I had a prominent
older couple and they lived in a lovely home in Arlington made for retirement.They were my clients for years and were very entrenched in the Town. The wife was having some emotional struggles andseemed to just want to escape whatever. They had a get away home down south for the winters and a Cape home for the summers.and they had all the financial trappings that one might want.
she came into my business one day and stated that she was selling her home and how upse her husband was and said he would not sell. She told me where she wanted to go to and I was in a rock and a hard place because I had a client who cared about making a decision that looked very unstable and unnecessary but that’s where each one of us is allowed the dignity of our decisions. I tip toed the situation carefully with my brothers being honest and supportive. Well, my client went ahead and purchased the new condo and had us go in to change items she did not like. She and her husband went off to Florida while the work was being completed. Well, she came back and stopped the work saying that her husband was devastated and would not move into the condo. They never moved in and they moved into an in law suite at their daughters home. Miles from their home town. She spent her life driving back and forth for her doctors, and shops that she frequented it was very sad. Her husband passed not too much later. She followed a few years later. It was a powerful life lesson for me to witness and learn from. In case number 1 they were a regular folks. He worked in manual labor his wife was a crossing guard. In case number two they were affluent and you would not think that stuff like this would happen. Like I have said before emotions are very powerful. I honesty do not know if full happiness is achievable in this world. I have been very grateful to have had such a nice life. But, there are moments in this life with cancer that I wish I could run and escape it. Which I know is not something that I cannot do.
The couple of things that has kept me anchored throughout this process is God, faith and my family. I focus on the moment that I am in to the best of my ability without projecting too much into the future and my own personal desires.
I guess the best I or we can to is to count our blessings take a deep breath and give it to God as the prayer says be still and know, that I am God and that we all experience the struggle on this Earth.we will get through it.
I heard from my friend Tim today and he said that his wife my friend Leslie who is in home hospice is gravely ill. So please pray for Leslie, Tim and their family.
Also, one of my wife’s
And we should pray for eachother and our own needs Amen.God Bless,
My last blog got 2 different responses most were like keep going and you got this I also received one comment from a very good friend asking me to be sure that my desire is in my heart from God. I spend so much time in prayer and feel so at peace helping others. It was suggested to me that my wanting to step out and help may be self activated by my own personal desire. I responded back via email to the best of my ability that yes, I know it’s a calling from God just as I know that my personal desire to be active and be a positive influence in people’s life is definitely contributing my trying to get baby steps going beyond my blog.
God puts desires in our hearts and if he wants something then he will make the way for it to happen, because in this life it not just about ourselves. We are fisher of men for God and a whole lot of people are lost, alone or frightened. There is no need for this.
so, I have a burning in my heart that I will not deny. It’s my work for Gods glory as I see it.
I am still considered to be terminally ill. The only thing that I know is that sometime in my future I will before God answering to him about my life and what I failed to do and what pleased him. I will not deny one thing that I feel God asks of me. I told my priest and friend years ago with my first bout of brain cancer that I would be the best handicapped version of myself that I could in the last year or so I started to pout a bit about my health precidiment. That’s when my truest a best friend s and my family one by one said a few words to me that helped me to see that I was setting myself up for failure by my own negative self talk. As they called it and it was. I am sure Evil the Devil was thrilled that I was a bit discouraged. God sent in the Angels in my life to stop that train on the tracks and turn it around. We I am back stronger than ever with even more zeal to get to my goal. Leave no one behind that God leads me too.
I am am finding my òwn way back to God carrying a torch of light with me, so aren’t you so, smile and pull your cross behind you. It will all end well! We are all related to our one God and Brother Jesus. Amen.
This morning was beautiful quiet, reflective and prayerful. I woke up early this morning per usual and my wife Janet was up and about taking care of our four legged family members and then she was off for errands. I layed in bed looking out of the skylights and was doing my personal inventory. As I have written time and time again. Their are so many different layers to each life experience that we have. I think we have large general thoughts of things that happen in our lives of acceptance , we then live beyond that descriptive moment and find the depth of the meaning of the life change and its actual effect on my mind set and where I am at. Well for the last 4 years I have been feeling pretty useless and have been trying to figure out what God wants for me to do so I took my baby steps with my blog and outreach to other cancer patients I found the layers of working with other cancer patients. My personality is based out of compassion and connection and I bond with people so easily. As a result I have been effected in my emotions and psyche as my friends has progressed in their illnesses or left this world. Love is the most powerful bond and emotion that there and I get to loving people pretty quickly.
So, this morning I layed in bed and I was thinking about my act 2 as I have called it and where I think God wants me to be to serve his needs. And, honestly to be able to contribute to my familiesfinancial needs. Well, this week I moved a little more in the direction of getting my feet onto the path towards tomorrow. Last night I just laid in bed looked at the stars as I thought wow, I am so excited and yet I am a little intimidated by the un known. For the 1st time since Glio, I will be potentially be stepping out to speak publically to a group of individuals to help motivate and show them that Gods got our situations . I have not traveled by myself since my Cancer and left sided situation began. I rely on my wife for so much. never Being now a handicapped version of myself will pose my first challenge. So, my decision to push on towards my future is bringing on yet a real life reality that I need to face and conquer overcome. God will make it happen and I need to accept with a grateful heart what the Lord has in store for me. Life is full of challenges for each one of us but we cannot back away. It means simply stepping out of our boat and comfort zone into the water and trusting that we are steadied and protected by Jesus Christ. I for one believe.
change is good and it’s only through adversity that I will find my higher calling and best personal self so here we go I guess!! Lol
please keep in your prayers as I pray for your needs Amen
God Bless you all Danny
at church today, I found out that another one of my friends went to the Lord this week. He was a wonderful and holy man in his 50’s also. Please pray for Teddy A and his lovely family.
also, please continue to pray and send your love and support for my friend Leslie who is currently in home hospice with her husband Tim and their daughter by their side. Thankyou
So, I will wait in the hope of Christ to see what happens and will manage if and when the time comes. I will tell you one thing if I am called I will show up no matter what.
Just Danny Speaks 