I have come to understand fear. I have never felt fear to a degree that I have been stopped literally in my tracks until about 2 weeks ago.. I now know it’s power.

Fear is not of God It is in my case an emotional thought run a muck. I triggered the reaction in myself about two weeks ago. I wrote about an incident I had while at the track when  I was walking where I was so angry with myself about being negative plus being sick of my situation that I pushed myself to the point of nearly falling. It was only by the grace of God that my daughter showed up in that moment to assist me.

Well, as I have found since that occasion I am finding it extremely difficult to walk in  areas that I have walked before. I fill with fear and freeze in place. So, I have found myself having to stop and remember the fact that I can walk and that I will be okay. My sister in law witnessed my freezing up while walking to the car and just said c’mon you ‘ll be fine. I was out with my wife and it happened again. I know what caused my traumatic memory, me. The fact that I was walking fast and was angry with myself and the extreme feeling of trying to stay standing with no one around me left a bad trauma in my memory which effected my psyche.

I ended up making my way to where I needed to go but it was sheer will that got me through.

I have never dealt with fear like this before so perhaps I needed this in my life so I could fully comprehend what it is and what some people live with on a daily basis.

Fear in my case is senseless because around my home and other places that I frequent I walk around normally. its just in new areas that are unknown to me

I know one thing I am going to face this fear and get this behind me. In my case it is my faith and the true reality of the fact that, I am okay that will get this lie to leave my mind and emotions and allow me to contunue the walking and healing of this body. Amen.

Fear is an emotion induced by a threat perceived by living entities, which causes a change in brain and organ function and ultimately a change in behavior, such as running away, hiding or freezing from traumatic events. Fear may occur in response to a specific stimulus happening in the present, or to a future situation, which is perceived as risk to health or life, status, power, security, or, in the case of humans, wealth or anything held valuable. The fear response arises from the perception of danger leading to confrontation with or escape from/avoiding the threat (also known as the fight-or-flight response), which in extreme cases of fear (horror and terror) can be a freeze response or paralysis.

When the fear came upon me my entire left side froze like stone. I have left side weakness and have tone issues with the side. I could not breathe either. yet, when pulled forward, I moved through it.

I found this good little explanation of what fear is and does.

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=working+through+the+fear+site%3ayoutube.com&FORM=VIRE9#view=detail&mid=ACC0DAAA4E9E5DC4D594ACC0DAAA4E9E5DC4D594

After watching this video again I am amazed at how much his description and experience are similar to mine and perhaps yours too.

I have been in a process of discovery, learning a lot of bodily  motions all over again. From balance through movement. It is a long 1″ at a time victory. I have been called a slow motion miracle. As I have said before I am grateful to God and everyone that has assisted and prayed for me.Thank you and God Bless You. 🙂

I do not write or talk too much about my wife. She is a sweet, quiet private person. I will say this though I absolutely could not have been given a better gift of a wife. Without her I would not have made it through this whole ordeal. She has carried my family and has done so with such beauty and grace. Now she will kill me for writing about her but I needed to give her the credit and God the glory of his goodness to me, my children and our friends.

God Bless You,

Danny