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Just Danny Speaks

~ Victory through God

Just Danny Speaks

Category Archives: Uncategorized

The simple pleasurers in this life are often the most taken for granted.

30 Friday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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As I have written in my past blogs for those who may housebound or may have issues with getting out due to stairs whether infirm or elderly the info may be useful. I have also written in my past blog posts that I think that we we who were Blessed to have been born into a country such as The United States of America, have been so so blessed and so very privileged our earlier ancestors here often had a different experience and carried the heavy lifting so that we could benefit. As time has gone on throughout my life my eyes have really opened to this reality.For instance my Irish immigrants came to their locales and the slogan was no Irish need apply. They took jobs doing whatever they could. Both my parents grew up with out houses and had to maintain them as well. They went to bed with hot waterbottles, siblings etc. My dad dad tells of having holes in his shoe with cardboard to keep the snow out as they walked to school and church. My dads parents purchased a home by hard work and the grace of God onThe corner of pring Street and PleasantStreet They were settling in for a better life with their family at that time. The State decided to build Rte 2 from Cambridge up to Concord so their home which was a historical home that was raided as the British as as they Advanced toward Lexington through Arlington towards Lexington and Concord My dad said there were still musket holes from gun fire on the walls and stairway as evidence the State took it by eminent domain for a pittance and my My grandparents were so upset they left the State to N.H. Londonderry to be exact where they built a new home by their hands beautifully. And began. It was that generations legacy of faith resilience and love of country which has equipped my family for this moment. They are the bricks s that are now holding my entire family up from my dad down to his grandchildren. I am sure all of my ancestors are in on this from above with Gods blessings. I continue very well today. Here with some of my children, lovely bride and I just have the slightest of colds. Shave not had one of those in over 6 years so I am not complying . I just had soup homemade Lasange soup that my youest daughter Rachael and her awesome boyfriend made ( it is a vegan recipe and it is so darn good. not our holding uDailyTheir life’s of love ❤️ continue on love never dies it is timeless and they inspire me to encourage others through my blog effort. It by Gods grace I sit here today doing something that I had prayed for purpose and help 🏡 in Arlington Ma and Just our/ my medical care through Gods graces and those he blessed with this gifts and and personal talents inspirations of knowledge for medicines,machines and skills of their hands plus an economy to support the industries needed to bring them to the patients it has been a benefit To us all.From the aspirin through the most potent clinical trial they are wrapped in my mind as one thing Miracles and hopes for the masses. As I mentioned on my recent blog for those who cannot get out of their homes easily the chair company that is attached to many ambulance services will come out if contacted in advance through their dispatch unit as a non emergency and will set up and appoint and come to your home and physically lift you up the stairwell. They arrive with no fan fare etc.and silly strap you into their professional chair that has belts to make sure you are safe and protected. after being safely strapped into their medical. Chair they can take you out to an awaiting car as they did from my blog post escape from Hospice house and like yesterday they came to get me upstairs to my bath that was safe for me. They returned when called and took me back down and made sure I was comfortable and safe in my family room chair/ docking station👍. It is a great that I published last week. Well, that chair car company was here today that I mentioned in my recent log post scheduled and the crew came today carried me up to the second floor to my children’s bath with the modifications that were necessary for my safe use. My personal care attendant Guy showed up and met me upstairs he got me into a regular shower for the 1st time since I left here for the hospital abruptly in November. Since that time it has been sponge baths which are better than nothing but it’s not a shower is so much nice and rejuvenating to be in a shower, a safe and warm environment

As I was in the shower I said to Guy, my personal care attendant from the Vising Care Nurses orginazation that the shower to me in this moment. I had wanted it for so longthis is a Miracle I had wanted to get to my/ any shower so badly for that matter. I have plenty of bathrooms here but none of them here but twere easily inaccessible because of stairs and their design. I belong to the Y.MCA as well but I did not want to try their shower situation whereas I am so weak. It could quickly become a bad situation, a fall or worse and what person going out to work out wants to deal with dramaAll of my showers hererequire one thing stairs, walkability etc. which stairs are out for me maybe 1-2 stairs at a time but not 14 stairs to to each level.

My attitude has always been one of abundant gratitude and a positive attitude. Guy and I have spoken over the weeks about his Haitian background and coming here for a better life with his 4 children years ago and how he was trained for his career I call it is personal ministry that he felt called to be part of . It’s all about helping others. job Guy is now in service working in the hospice industryover 20 years Whether he is here in a setting or he is assigned to a hospice home in any given area he is working hard and serving others. I said to Guy, I am a very spoiled man. I said this shower is making me feel so alive. I had forgotten just how great they are and how they make you feel. It’s like a rebirth of sorts as a matter of fact 5 years ago after my original diagnosisof terminal brain cancer. I was in my My everyday morning showerrushing military style to get out the door and punch in to work by 4:45,a.m my mobility was still pretty good back them before swelling!treatment etc. I remembered a mee that Janet our friends Jamie and Andrew home It was based on the teachings of Saint Francis DeSalles.

It was As I. showered that I remembered one of those teaching and it brought me so much comfort while giving my life back to God for his goodness always. I began immediately tooffer my shower every morning I got up a little earlier to make sure I met my obligation to get into work on time and they extra few minutes allowed me a few more minutes in prayer too getting myself in a good place for work, the load that needed to be done and any personalities that I may encounter during that people are people so some days are great others can be a bit more demanding which is what a life in any service can be. up as a reminder of our baptism commitment. I love that so much So, today in my shower I silently recommitted myself once again. I told my friend Guy my personal care attendant that we who have never lacked simple comforts such as heating, cooling and water who have a roof over their heads etc really take things for granted. So, I just am so grateful for the blessing tonight as I sit her in my recliner, docking station with my warm house. Pellet stove running and my children whipping up a snack in the kitchen right now. My daughter Rachael and her boyfriend Austin are making vegan perogies. They shopped for the ingredients earlier. The house smells unbelievable. We will then just sit and spend quiet time and talk and then it’s lights out for me anyway.
It was a beautiful.
This song came to mind and made me smile. It is in terms of my waiting to get into the shower for so long . I new it would happen but i needed patience is was in Gods time and that happened today.When it was suggested for me to cancel the chair lift at first I understood but I also was sad. I am always hopeful and saw it as my opportunity to get up stairs. Hospice due to their vast experience understand sudden change and I needed to respect that because who knows. Plu, my kids did not want the family house to have a valueless reminder of their fathers illness permanently left for my mom and them. I understand that too. 15 or so years ago my mother in law Vera moved into our first home for 17 or so months she had congestive heart failure and could not do the stairs either we called out a chairlift company at that point and she spent thousands of dollars to have a chair made to fit that staircase up. Most homes are not a straight shotvup particularly in New England they have often times landings between levels and then resume up the next set of steps to the next level. Both of our homes by their style had this same type of staircase situations, each machine whether here or on CharlescStreet required custom rails that the chair rides up on so they are expensive. WMy shower today was a form of renewal to my mind,my body my Spirit and to my emotions.i hope all of today in this moment to be blessed by our daily gifts of a home and all of its comforts including food can look up and say Thank God and please God may we all strive to truly eradateneed for someone else. This world needs more Saint Theresa’s . I look at all the Foundations I know their causes are probably noble in purpose but the Money that comes in and go’s out at some point must be getting pilfered or used incorrectly. We are talking Billions a year I am sure and it’s part of the American Aid that Go’s abroad. That’s my fav nail thought on this writing. I heard randomly while laying in my bed last night the song live aid and thought that song was good it’s message strong. I think since that song at one point. Money back then given as aide to Africa resulted in the two tribes in Africa. One hating the other got moneys and purchased machetes they went to the village next and slaughtered them because of ethnic cleaning. So that was horrible. I will

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcmEQ7DhKGU

I would like to ask for prayers for anyone who is missing a family member for a loss. It makes the Christmas and Holiday Season including NewYears a bit sad
Also, if you could pray for my/our friend Deacon Paul’s cousin His name is Louis Vitale he is in a New York hospital in great pain with cancer that has spread to multiple organs he is a man of faith is is around my age in his 50’s and has children as well.
I will be praying for you all and your intentions. We are so grateful
. Also, please pray for the families of George Michael and the family of Carrie Fisher and her mom Debbie Reynolds what a terrible shock for that family. One of my best friends on this planet K. Said least night on the phone none of us know when the bell will toll for thee and he is right. The Bible says that we we never know the hour the day or the minute will of when God will call us home by name.
God Bless us all, may you all have a beautiful, healthy and successful 2017. If and when the time comes that I am unable to do my blog work. I will have my son update my condition and situation. Please know this… my family has access to my wordpress and my Facebook page for this specific reason. Thank you for your love and prayers they certainly have been carrying us. To God be the Glory.

Getting cocky is very dangerous..

28 Wednesday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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Getting cocky and impatience can be dangerous. Follow all directives for your own safetyifyou are in hospice or under a doctors orders. This is what I did Christmas morning that was not good and caused fear and mass upset in my home with my family. My intentions were good but I just did not want to put anyone else anid in my minds eye I saw it done so I stupidly did this….I have just found this song and it is perfect for any of our lives situations Patience,is always prudent especiallyif you are a type A personality which is exactlywhat I am it has served me well in life. I kept the balls in the air. I keptmultiple clients busy at one time and was present to my family.

It will never happen again I can assure you and my family of that.
I am totally sure of that because I could have had a very bad injury that would have had me in the hospital or worse a nursing home. I have always said I accept hospice out patient but I never want to being in a nursing home I just do not like them at all I think for an older person who is safe and are well taken care of they are great but being fiercely independent in my mind that would be real suffering of which I would I am sure not do well. You have to know who you are.

Christmas morning was so beautiful my Janet and children and their significant others thwhether they are married or not Married or they are ous.We love them all so much. They are our family. others for the most part love them all They have been with we Most have them have been here since my diagnosis 5 yearsago to support our family and my children. Janet and I always asked God to bring our children good people for their life’s journey. Every step no matter what the need their entire familieshave been present with us as well. . God has blessed us so abuntly here. God is so good to us As, I have said Janet does not stop for a moment 99:/: of everything falls on her including working a difficult and highly technical job with little errors being tolerated so after 5 years of cancers do the current situation that cancer has left me I I feel so badly that she barely sleeps and is now dealing with everything hospice and what Meds I do or do not need filling out all kinds of forms towards my eventual transition to the Hospice home that I selected.As I say that I have said my family wanted me here. I could not do that. I have said I want to privacy and professionals managing my personal needswhile the hospice supports my family. I have seen this in action and want my family particularly my wife children siblings and my dad to be okay. Right now, it’s about me per usual. When I leave this home, if I do it is mainly about my family not about me I love them so much.My family ar my life and I will do anything always to protect them.My mother always taught us to say what you mean, mean what you say just do not be mean when you say it and I will speak to a couple of people who have been less than loving over the years. It’s part of my life so, I need to just put things justly and kindly into place. When you get closer to the end of your journey you begin to want things to be neatened up.
Christmas Morning I woke up and everyone was here.Cooking and Janet was up and running per usual with little to no sleep. I wanted to get freshen up before dinner.Plus I decided that I had to go to my brothers for the family gathering to see my dad, siblings and my entire family. Especially because we do not know what tomorrow will bring. We all just wanted to be with them as one
Janet said I am going up to get ready. I said go ahead honey. She said, I can help you later to freshen up. I felt so bad for her I said thanks honey yOu never have 5 minutes take care of yourself. I thought I was being helpful Not!
After she went up I decided I can do this without bothering anyone. My strength on my right side is strong my balance is good which allows me safety in the restroom when I am in there.
I went into the bathroom quietly Janet had already brought down my bath items and is extremely organized. I went in and began to freshen up. I sat on a large towel that I placed on the cover. My left leg is hard to deal with it is dead weight. In order to put my sock on or sneaker on for safety. I need to lean forward and grab my left leg with my right hand and pull it up across my right knee in order to get my sock and sneaker on. This time as I went to get up my towel spun on the toilets plastic cover and I flew off on the floor slip and my right shoulder hit the door making a large bang. Everyone screamed. Poor Janet who was upstairs screamed and raced from upstairs to check on me. She ran down the stairs and pull her back muscles which just stopped hurting her yesterday.As I say I was trying to be considerate and loving but my careless decision almost hurt the one that I love so much. My fall resulted in a small scratch on my knee but nothing more thank God only. I did not him my head which is a major concern with the doctors, nursesand my family a fall like that where my head gets impacted because of surgeries, treatments could easily cause a stroke an aneurism or death. So, yes I have learned a lesson that I will never forget. My Personal care attendent who is awesome read me the riot act when he was here yesterday. My hospice nurse Mary too was kind but stern. Like I say hospice is about love and safety preventing further injury. I again am so grateful for my VCA service providers.
So, if you are feeling impatient in a situation such as mine wait.
Fortunately cease guys were here and the fact that I no longer able to get up on my owne he boys were able to get my door open and slide me. They sat me up stood me up and dressed me so. I was all set.
Later on that afternoon because I threw off the whole day’s schedule. My siblings, their children and my guys here brought up my wheel chair strapped me in and carried me out my front door and took me to my brothers home where they carried me directly into Steves living room so I needed to use no energy. It was a blessing to me to be there. We had not called the chair car early enough to set up their service. The Christmas Holiday is one of their busiest days which totally makes sense. I am not the only person who needs assistance. Now,
Please pray a general prayer for
 

Escape from hospice house!

25 Sunday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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First off Merry and Holy Christmas. Today’s writing is Escape from hospice house. I realize that thiis writing is a bit long but it is truly ment to impart any tidbit of info that may be or find themselves in a situation that is similar to mine. We are all connected. Tomorrow I will touch upon Stubborness and being perhaps a little too self assured. I broke a role yesterday that could have gotten me into big trouble thank God, I was fine but I scared my family and particularly my wife who does need any more stress. Fortunately the guys in my life were here to assist but thats for tomorrow. This little life event took place over a week ago know. I had been in the home hospice life for well over a week af nd I do not get out much because the stairways are my newest enemy.About 1 month ago, I saw and asked my son Dannyand asked him is their a new Star Wars movie coming Star Warscoming out? I thought that I had read or seen somewhere that there was. somewhere he said yes,I said to him okay I would like to take you my treat this time👍🎅🌲Since my son has grown up and been working he wants to doeverything for me and pay too. Dan and I have spent so much father son time together since birth partly because economically speaking in our home my wife and I had to work opposite shifts to raise our family and supportive needs. Necessities of that day made my parenting much better than it may have been if I were at adifferent economic level.Our careers did not require much travel so we were always as a family floating in our families universe. My siblings in the family business were there living similar lives with thir children so their was continuity, structure, love support and play time for us children and adults we hahve just gotten so long well any things that were not well with our relationships as sibling my brothers etc were handled directly by my parents and my mom was no shrinking violet .AT My parents home every week end was the arrival car after car,every Sunday with13grand children emerging and running around the yard. My parents yard had a small kiddie pool, a swing set, all of the kids little bikes. Cozy couples and children’s sized picnic tables with umbrella their dog Toni and a little basket ball hoop. It was a child’s dream and ours too with my mom and dad greeting us ,kissing and the food that they always were ready to cook and serve. At one point one of my brothers brought one of those power jeeps so cute is was shiny plastic and maroon with gold accents it was my nephews Stevie’s and he attempted to drive at full throttle at any moving target lol a family snapshot of old Americana I guess. So, back on topic. As, child Dan,and our my children had a relationship just like your were too. Read psalm #139 GOD KNOWS ALL AND IT IS WRITTEN IN HIS BOOK predestined by God and I spent like many of you hours at Tee ball, baseball, soccer fields, track events ,dance revitalization my daughter’s, karate studios walking around farms with the kids to see animals etc. Dad stuff. This time and bond has been my biggest personal award of success in my WHole life personal belief. It love is supporting me now in the hour of my need.Back to my escape lol. I had not written about this right afterbecause my blog is meant to be helpful info and not to set people running out of their hospice settings ! So, I prayed and spoke to my hospice people to ask if they felt it was a good eye. They explained that the way the escape was executed for my safety that it was and I was not a prisoner. LolThis is what happened when I asked my son about the movie and ended up back in the hospital again only to be sent home to hospice my son felt bad because he felt we would not see it together since Dan and I also bonded over the movie releases including Star Wars. Truth be told years ago when it came out my son was my catalyst to go. I grew to loveStar Wars through my sons young eyes and I can picture now sitting next to his little body with his littlehair flipped up in the theatre a s he was smiling as he ate his popcorn. Dan I love Star Wars, I loved Lord of the Rings, I loved Godzilla as a kid the new ones not so much.Dan has watched them with me. I have watched with my daughters things that they love too. You have to meet your children where they are at. I certainly have tried.So, a week or so back. There was a persons at the front door. Very quiet but then I I heard the words right down here. It was a chair car with two attendants and they had a chair with straps and blanket. The chair car staff lifted me from my recliner and put me into the chair securely and off I went to my escape arranged by my Janet and the kids. I had not been to a movie in months nor had I been to a restaurant for a burger either. So, the ambulance service took me down and safely put me into my car in the driveway. I had not been in my car since April and it’s a small SUV CRV Honda and I love it’s easy for me to get in and out of Allof my family the men in my life, my son, so inlaw, my other daughters boy friends were there and we went in our caravan of cars to the IMAX complex at Jordan’s Reading Walker brook.The tickets for everyone had already been purchased so it was less waiting and the theatre had been sold out so our seats were secure. We went directly to Fudruckers for burgers.i had been there for at least 5-6 years and I enjoyed even the burger even more that I would have imagined. We next headed off to the theatre. IMAX is incredible. The movie was great too. Janet kept gently waking me up because I kept falling to sleep from my extreme exhaustion. She felt badly. After the movie ended mI was back to the wheelchair back to and on our way out of the theatre their was a group of Christmas Carolers, young, old male and female from The Mass General Hospital singing and collecting donations for Cancer research. It was so beautiful sitting there singing with them. I had not seen a Caroling group like this in years. It ma de the night even more beautiful. It was a special night and the final stop was back to our home where the house and thambulance service had just arrived back for me and they were waiting to bring me back in . I was so glad to go but as they say… There is no place like home my recliner, my new bed. My family my old puppies all exited to see us. in they were awesome.i felt alive after being out sights, sounds, smells. I also realize that if I were in a full time Hospice facility this may not have been easy to pull off because of their personal liability. I would check before any plans are made it so happens that my physical capacities are still allowing me a bit of mobility I have clear thought andthe Dr’s everyone continued to be shocked that I am functioning at such a high level giving the monster tumor in my head and now there is no treatment on top of that . The treatment plan I was last on just stopped working and options for the new tumor were zero. I do not worry, Gods got it no matter what. Since I began hospice. Hospice suggested for me/us to scrap changes that I /we were was to execute to our home here in this moment.financial andplans in this moment We have taken their recommendations to lheart and have canceled the implementationof these changes. We trust the Hospice staff, their years of experience and feel that they are here to help by Gods election in our lives in this moment. So, they can look without the emotions of a family trying to navigate through very uncharted waters for us.Its now Monday morning as I revisit this post and it was a beautiful Christmasfilled with family, well wishes coming and going,The men in my life I call the posse. Brothers, brother in laws, onephews, my children son and my son in law Chris are converged back here at the Riley homestead and they strapped me into my light weight wheelchair as they had seen the chair car do. My son even called to make sure that it was done properly because we had not booked their service early enough. My family got me to my brothers home down the street to my brother Steves house where my almost 89 years old dad and family awaited us for more snacks and delicious desserts. It again was so great! Everyone was busy so my family stepped in once again. It may good for others living this in this moment.I found this clip with my dark sense of humor.I hope you do get a laugheI and that you enjoys his! God bless you all this beautiful day. Jesus came a new once again last even today for us in our hearts and is can change our hearts, world if we turn to his loving heart and message of a humble, life of generosity to one another, service and gifts of the Most Holy Spirit that’s my hope for this ever darkening world for my Children, family and future generations that God blessed us with. We are capable of better if we try but I believe we are heading for destruction at this point by our unguided wandering and free will choices. Here is the clip I honestly hope you get a chuckle keep laughing no matter what life is short it’s often difficult but it’s beauty is undeniable its hopeful and always loving. ❤️❌⭕️👍👍 Just Me 🎅🙏🙏🙏v=dVuxmmhnVgE In closing I had a true CHRISTMASMiracle here yesterday When my son announced that a VI P visit who is an executive that a exective affiliated with Disney, Pixar,And Lucas Films was coming to our home for a private screening of Rogue 1 in the comfort of my own.Here is the funny clip that made me laugh. I hope it attached properly. With my wife, family and children. As, I had said earlier my trip to IMAX althoughnothing was required I had dozed off. My son fearing that their getting me out of this house had spurred him and his beautiful wife to just send off an email to that particular group and were shocked to hear back right away from R. R said it would be their pleasure and set it up R had family in the area and was flying in from California to visit family for his Christmas gathering and his family was so kind as to share his time with us. R came at 1:00 pm sharp as he discussed with My son. He came in quietly humbly embracing us and was carrying an original DVD from Lucas Films and he placed into our player. R had to put in a special code to unlock for our 1 time wiewing. There were no copies made , and his original was taken with him. I will be purchasing it once it goes to release. The movie, plot and story line was developed beautifully.to R his family and all of those who gave him the green light May God Bless You all for creating this moment in my home with my son and family. Love from the Riley family eternally.Danny and family.Amen. I would like also for everyone this beautiful Christmas Day to pray for R’s family as they make their way back to California safely. Also, R beautiful wife and he are expecting their first child in May I believe so please offer up a prayer for this as wellGod bless you all my friends. Life can be difficult but life and love always gbanish the darkness and sorrow.To my son, my 4 th daughter and my entire family you are my heart and wind under my wings foreverThrough eternity.The so, husband,and 👍❌⭕️🌲🌲❤️❤️❤️❤️😇😇😇 The bottom line to any shut ins that may read this and find themselves stuck in their homes… Call your local ambulance company and ask them about their chair car carry out service. There are 2 in my areas hat I am aware of. if I schedule in advance for them to come and get me from my home down to a vehicle such as my families or I need to simply get upstairs with my personal care attendant to my shower it a flat fee of $50.00

The Miracle of Brad Michael.

23 Friday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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Ii

This blog is going to contain information of Janet and i’s second son that we had named Brad Michael. He was a beautiful little baby that we had been-found to have an issue with his heart this was almost 28 years ago and the technology of that day suggested that it would be corrected through surgery etc. Brad was totally safe and protected through my wife. He grew normally in the womb and had all that he needed safety oxygen and love An infant gets its oxygen in utero  through what’s know as a PDA valve. Brad was over 8′ ponds at birth nice and pink because of his mothers great care with blond hair and pretty blue eyes. He was adorable. Once your child is born or delivered they then need to be able to use their own heart and lungto continue their journey.

We had a huge number of Dr’s with in the O.R. From Bostons Children’s Hospital with us  us as Brad-greeted the world. was born the team in the O.R. was on the job working with him  we had found out how he was presenting  physically. there. Brads condition,was far worse than originally thought Janet was sent home on bed rest for 6 monthsuntil such time as Brad was ready based on an amneo  sentesus which checks the fluid for the baby’s lung development.With DJ being around 3 and needing care etca a nd my having to hto work . Going home to Belmont was not an option Janet was put onto bed rest Hense she too could not take of him etc. with no outings and limited bath runs for his protection. fter Brads birth the Children’s team that was  was in the O. R.on him right away checking his vitals and trying to evaluate him . It was determined that it was worse that what they had first thought through the earlier Ultra sound.After his next ultra sound after birth on his own anatomy looked showed a much more grim  scenario. My parents being as here family and friends and siblings jumped in and helped to dismantle DJsbedroom at our apartment in Belmont so his belonging s were brought to my parents house as was his art work,from his walls his stuffed animal hammock. 😜Lolso cute! They were big back in the day❗️Kids loved them, parents vacuumed them .

My dad after working 3 jobs over the years when necessary to provide with my mom for their families needs had just prepared their home with new paint etc. We arrived to their / our family home their living room was totally emptied and their were two new beds there with a dresser forerunner  use too. I went up stairs and saw DJ.new bedroom. All of his furniture, everything that was home to him in Belmont and my parents elation to be of service to their family. My dadand my mom  would be up with DJ in the kitchen early as I was ready to go off to work eating breakfast with hi. My siblings ,their children were around to play with him and pass time. My mom was home at lunch to help them wand also to set up adinner plans for the entire family whom ever was there toenjoy.including . We had not one issues, while we were there. And moved back to our apartment the day after Brads funeral. We then welcomed Our daughter Stacy home and moved to our first home in Wakefield and again were Bleesed with our second daughter Rebecca child healthy and finally Rachael joined our family healthy , happy and beautiful. All of these loving life events have given me such peace in this ultimate moment of my life. A sense of hope, faith and deep rooted security. I know that if and when my family were ever presented with such a situation. We would rise to the need and do the same thing. Faith, family,friends and  love always.BTW, 28 years ago the word abortion was offered to us as well. Janet I would not have even thought of it personally. We just believe whole hart idly that life is from God alone. It’s his election to infuse life and his election call us home in his time. If we had said yes to an abortion 28 years ago I feel that life would not be the same here in our home his loss was devestting to all 3 living generations of that time and helped Janet at I to find our way back to God where we grew in faith, lost or anger and were blessed with more healthy beautiful. That we were told could be dangerous because of what happened with Brad not that it was in the history or they we genetically disposed but by the fact that it had happened.

 

from the first ultra sound revealed a condition know as single right ventricle with pulminary stenosis. The odds of a positive outcome ever with surgeries back the We were told originally after the 1st ultra sound that there was an 85percent chance and now it was much more serious and the fight was on praying my entire family and many friends crying and supporting us through each day, each breath, su

We were rushed through the tunnel from Brighams and Women’s to the Bostons Children’s Hospital. My mom was with me and Janet could not come she had a cesarean section scheduled so as not to stress Brads body/ heart with delivery again the Dr’s recommendation. We loved Childrens s as well they were wonderful professional and kind even during a very high stress and emotionally charged time for us.This song that I have selected I truly love the words and the Miracle of children especially with Christmas this weekend where Jesus was born to save man kind from sin is so appropriateMary said yes to God and his angel to give birth to a child which was very dangerous in her time whereas she was unwed. She told God your will be done. and Joseph a Sheppard that she was betrothed to protected her and believe Gods angel about the fact that Mary had been foreshadowed by the Holy Spirit to have this child. The working Mary did you know the one you deliver will soon deliver you I find absolutely poetic. That’s what Brad did to Janet and I his death at a young age was so stinging that it jolted us to the core. We had to begin again to find peace, joy and happiness.

As, a matter of fact we had our little guy D.J who I have described in my earlier writing who was very creative very wide eyed, smart and witty with the biggest brown eyes you would see is was 100 percent active boy people though he  might have AD.D. He  didn’t I would call it ants in his pants I guess lol.

This song is a song that Janet and I heard about 10 or so years ago that made us love Natalie Grant so much. The word about being held and how could this happen to those who loose their children resonated so deeply. I thought of this today and added this song in hopes that it may touch your hearts as well. Whether it’s a baby a miscarriage or adult child it is a real loss.

 

Natalie Grant Held. God is holding us that is how we are making it moment by moment, day by day, month by month and year by year. We come to celebrate their lives in time because they were our gifts and have changed who we are today.

❤️,

 

just danny and family. Live from my home away from home.

 

 

 

 

This again is the song popular back in the day that my son age almost 3 sang that caused my wife to climb into the back of car to hug.

 

 

Here

 

Dans love and creative mind has given us joy beyond belief. He started college slowly and then hit is own stride and his own dream in his heart. He attended BU for his animation studies on his own dime this time and excelled he has been happily employed by a wonderful company for over the past years he does private works of art for clients whatever they may desire. Digital portraits and has worked directly with studios fashion models and independent brands of clothing and foot apparel makers. He is here right nowworking to help we have a guest coming today and the house needed to be spiffed up❤️❌⭕️ The house traffic is slowing down but we have a VIP coming out I will explain in my next writing let me just say again that I am a spoiled and Blessed man.

 

My my next writing will be called escape from Hosice  house. lol I told you I am a brat!

what Brads passing at such a young age-taught me personally was just how connected I was with my son that I held only seconds after birth and death. It was not about the baby in my car, the baby that I fed or the baby getting his first bath , haircut laugh or word. It was the Miracle of his birth and our instinctive Love fro God himself. I have honestly over the years have said I wonder what he would have been like or who. I have always taken comfort because of my faith that I would someday be with him in my fullness as he will be in his as well. Brads birth and young death as tragic as it was brought Janet and I to where we needed to be todayTo deal with our current situation. Our children also feel very connected to their brother which is helping them as well.

God Bless you all Merry Christmas to everyone Amen

 

As, I always say. Sometimes we do not get the Miracle that we want …. Brad healed and here with us. I always say if we do not get the Miracle then we need be the Miracle Brad was that Miracleto us the strength faith and wisdom we required of the many years of coming to this day has been a Miracle to us we openly acknowledge this fact plus over the years we could try to help others through their same loss. Hopefully my blog might be a little Miracle in an area of your life if we have traveled a similar road. God Bless you all.

 

just Danny and family🎅🎅🎅🙏🙏🙏🌲🌲❌⭕️❤️❤️❤️❤️

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQM2rszMAfY

In Home Hospice 101

23 Friday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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Hello, As a follow up to yesterday’s blog post.

 

My my hospice journey began over 2 weeks ago after being told that my tumor(number  3) was very bad and that treatment options for me were exhausted. No more, chemo,no more radiation and no more more treatment. surgery.

My Dr. Dr.David Reardon, is to me one of the most beautiful Dr’s that I have met. He and his staff are second to none in my care at Dana Farber. He stated 2 more things that really touched my heart Dan you have a special soul and personality you have helped so many other patients of mine even in the waiting roo. He said your blog is helping so many and we all read every word. That’s when I cried I said Dr. That’s all I ever wanted to hear. That I was helping someone else. He said finally Dan, we will never allow you to feel pain and explained end of life Glio as needing more and more rest until you simply spleep without waking.

It was a transformative yet, comforting conversation. Delivered by a special man in the front line fighting a horrible cancer with a very high mortality rate. Yet, everyday he gets up and goes to battle in order to fight it bonding and loving the next patient and family with a fresh new hope and vigor. Now, that’s God in action! That’s a Miracle.

Back to 101 now.

In home hospice began right away. It’s not a jolting experience in any way except for the emotions on the family friends and patients over their new scenario. Hospice is not a topic that invokes a sense of joy.it is once that often involves fear which is totally understandable.i have been at peace with my personal situation and diagnosis since my original diagnosis back. In March 2012. TheyHospice staff who comes to my home each one has been an angels, the social worker who has come as welł has been very helpful helping us to plan a transitional plan to outpatient full time treatment for when we need to move into a full time Hospice center that is my desire. My family just wanted me here to take care of me but I want them to be together and not response for my personal needs. In the hospice center that I have selected. It allows me to be taken care of by staff and my families needs will be taken care of as well. Hospice can provide help without pressure to help guide you through a very emotional time one such as this that no one can truly prepare you for. The hospice staff is lovelythey are a peaceful group . So they are never an issue. They made suggestions on what I can do to insure my safety while I am here. They are about supporting their family and patient from any more harm. I love who they area do what their lives mission is all about. It’s Jesus in action serving. My personal care assistant is a dad of 4 children who migrated fro Haiti years ago for a better life and was trained over 20 years ago. His kindness,and quiet faith brings our eyes to tears. Everyone even my dad met him today and though he was great.

The nurse, my personal care assistant who safely helps me bath with such an easy, professional and safe manner. Hospice is love, service and

Hospice from my/ our personal perspectivesin this home  is phones, doorbells lots of family and friends in and out texts, emails of loving support cards and gives of food etc. peoples love on full display. So, it’s like a warm blanket. My children have fought to keep the flow down to have every second to just be a family. I tell them I understand and paramiters were set to short visits that did not take time from us personally. I also explained to them that we do not know when God will call I have already been here far longer than conventional wisdom would have said. I did not go out for milk and never come home again. I wrote on my blog recently that we never feel like it’s enough one last, one more  Ilove you, one my hug. One more kiss” it’s human nature saying bye is a very painful thing for those who are left behind. I like you all have felt this as well.

 

The he bottom line is that I tell them that Gods got them and I intend to watch over them. People asked me to come and give signs that I am around. I tell that I cannot guarantee anything I am not leaving to join a magic show or to become a ghost. My faith tells me about an eternal reward of Heaven where Weare restored on the day all tears will be wiped away. That’s what I believe. God knows what can or cannot be done beyond that he is still the God of the universe not me. So, again honesty is always the best policy I only speak what I think based on my own personal journey I think this blog has rolled on like people say with a tough topic and made it a little more understandable that is my prayer. God bless you all. Always, Danny

Yes, no one wants to die, I get that too especially when your life is overwhelmed by love. That’s my case I am a spoiled man with a large family, including my 4 children, wife, siblings, friends from all areas of my/ our lives and a 2 very strong faith based groups. One based out of my home Parish of St. Joseph in Wakefielld. Ma and the retreat house in Methuen that we have been envovled with for many Years known as St. Basils . It is a very Holy retreat home.

As, I laid in bed early this morning and looked at our Christmas tree in the living room the lights were still on. My wife loves the lights of Christmas the candles, and her pellet stove running. She cooks and bakes non stop for everyone. She is truly like Martha from the bible serving everyone. She always been that way . This Christmas with my situation has made it very difficult for she and my kids especially my dad I worry about also. He is older almost 89 to be exact and he is very active he lost my mom after being with her dating and married for over 60 years so seeing me here and being like this is really making him sad. I/ Janet lost my second son Brad to heart disease almost 28 years ago and that loss is still felt. More about love and what Brad taught me after his passing. I will write about this very soon separately. If God revealed it through our journey then we will all learn from the lessons. We are all connected and live lives where we are interconnected on so many levels.

Our new Christmas Tree.

when we moved to this newer home back in 2003 we brought along our years old tree of about 7-8 feet tall and it was thin which fit the size and scale of theology house  especially with the little kids digging around looking at their possible treasures lol.

We moved here and the rooms were largerand square the ceilings here are 9′ to 10′ high .So, the old tree was like a Charlie Brown tree lol .  Janet and I shopped for a taller tree and found one that we thought would look great and the price was agreeable Like so many tree it was prelit. Up the tree went and it was perfecto👍😀.Slowly the tree lights began to disappear. It was not a cheap tree. And then Da,da,da came the day to store it away so it was careful fully placed back in its protective wray and into the attic it went. It came down next year and was never the same again? It was a Christmas mystery. I have to assume that the wires were so thin that just be repositioned caused them to break. I felt bad Janet was now having to wind with the kids new strings of lights to give the tree the look of light that is a thing of beauty. We were not seeking perfection .It is clearly the way so many products are made. From appliances furniture etc.As, I lay in bed I looked at the beautiful tree that my wife’ childhood friend called and gave to us Jean Marie is a living doll.

Janet and I had to purchase a new tree and I said get another 7’5″ tree who cares let’s not waiste money. If she wanted one then she could get what made her happy. What do I really care! She not a big spender. And does not care about stuff, clothes shoes ,cars, etc. And then came a call from her friend hi Janet do you need a Christmas Tree?

We are selling our home in North Andover and moving to NH she would then retire to her new home she was moving abroad for a a year or so until she returns.

Next thing that we knew the tree was delivered here. It was put up and looks like it was tailor made for them room. Our Star that had not been used for years fit it nice and straight and it is so beautiful Janet is so happy having it up and working and this year we as a family can use every smile that we can get.

 

From the bottom ofour hearts Jean Marie and family God used you as a Christmas Angel my daughter snapped a few pictures for me that’s said were okay on her phone but they do not do justice to its true beauty. Safe Travelsand we love you Merry Christmas and Have a healthy, Happy and prosperous 2017🌲❌⭕️🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️

Danny and family. I will attempt to put tree photos up soon. 👍😀🎅🎅

From my hospital bed all of the beautiful lights

21 Wednesday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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Good day everyone,ii

II realize there are 3 different song links each with relevance to this blog entry.

I have heard so many times from family and friends it’s too bad that the timing of this assault on you us during one of your favorite times of year Christmas. I do love Christmas a whole lot ! My response has been in my mind and has just decided after prayer my response  to eemerge. If I do in fact decline quickly and go to God what more beautiful time to go during the time that Jesus Christs Birthday remembrance is ushers in. Christmas lights to be are not a contest they represent the hope and joy in Christs coming. Like the Star in Bethlehem so long ago that brought the Shepards to Jesus as well as the Magi.  in the light the hope and the salvation. My good friend Paul Sullivan Jr. Went to God last Dec20th surrounded by his lights his tree and his family friends in his hospice room. He was full of faith , hope and love.

I have been told personally over the last over 5 years that I am a Miracle and these things just don’t happen.my time was limited . I do not scoff at my Doctors or what statistics say about my on going ill s . I.Part of my still being hereI still  is my continuing to push forward every inch that I can to regain of my old self. and because of the Holy Spirit to which I believe and through anything is possiblethrough .  Including getting my license reinstated to which I drove perfectly for over 2 years and cancer came again and that was taken   awayagain  too. That was probably one of the hardest things for me to deal with. Now my major problem is stairs even if I could get down to my garage to my car I could not drive any way.

 

Well,

around2:00am this morning Janet helped me safely to the bath so that I did not slip anda fall  Fall and injury can occur . I went back and got into my hospital bed and Janet went back onto the sofa. She refuses to leave my side she often squeezes in behind Me get in so we can just hug and speak quietly for a while . When I first relented to the reality to having the bed that I do need I asked do they come bigger? I wanted a King sized. Lol I told you I am a spoiled brat lol.I seem to go to bed earlier and earlier daily and fall to sleep immediately.

back on point. 4 four almost 5 years as I watched my friends fall from anything from Glio, pancreatic, lung, cancer of the eutiris, breast , cancer leukemia etc I realized more and more that God had me here but my life is truly in a very precarious place where my physical capabilities may be lost, my faculties included. So, in the silence of my mind some days when’s was out  out with my family or even in a crowd in my mind I would think I wonder if I will make my next birthday will I make my daughters and my sons weddings ? at that time conventional wisdom was saying no.

well, I danced at my daughters wedding in June of 2015 to her husband of her dreams Chris and we love he and his family too. So God is so good. This was the song that my daughters and I used when they were little and it is beautiful my daughter asked dad can we use this song I said sure and I loved it. It was about faith and love always with our children here. And I thank God it was.

Here is the song that Stacy and I danced too. I say dance-lightly my left side prevents me from moving in an area like that but who cares I and she clung to eachother thanking God for beautiful moment weal had prayed for. Through faith anything is possible.i

 

 

Stacy and I Thankyou God

 

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wioB4AQsYzg

I would think will I make Thanksgiving? Or Christmas . I would forecast out a fun event and visualize it. For instance our simple summer vacation to Bradford NH for 1 week. I knew that tiny cottage, I new what to expect a quiet yet fun family get away. County roads, the lake very little traffic on the Roads and Lake Sunappee, family, board games scrabble laughter etc. I would project forward with the goal of being there. It gave me something.to reach for. Our friends trips-to New York did this with me too. It was a future destination that was so desired not that I like New York that much but because we love our friends so much. They are simply the best. It is always wonderful. For us. Every time I go to visit I have had yet another Glio physical setback and become weaker and less capable  than I was. So, I am work which makes me feel badly. They tell me to stop it and it’s no bother when I say sorry constantly. It gave me hope and joy. I did not share with everybody my thoughts abot my future because I did not want these thoughts in their  mindset all the time.I always remember and tell those around me I am very much at peace because God gave that to me perhaps without cancer I would not have received his peace-that i thave right  now. The peace I truly believe is to facilitate To do a my writing ministry to help others. Gods gifts to each one of us are meant to be shared with eachother and they are meant to sharewith others especially when they are in need. We are the light to eachother. In my life as I tell my friends we are to store our treasures in Heaven I call them graces.after my first diagnosis and seeing God working so powerfully in my life I began during confession thanking God for his love and mercy and at the end after my confession I said please Lord give my graces to anyone who may need them for whatever their needs might be. God knows all, I don’t . I know Gods got me and you too.

Tomorrows writing will be more of n in depth view of what the beginning of in home hospice looks like and what to expect.

I can only use a couple of words, love, softness, care for the patient support of the family. Professional and they have endless # of resource idea for anything you may need. Even a social worker to help coordinate in advance a transitional plan to where I myself and family are desiring for me when and if it is necessary for me to be moved. Their is never any pressure for anything! Just hey, we are here for whatever you need.

it has definitely love in action. My personal health care gentleman is so caring and professional. The hospice workers can also identify even the smallest of changes and decline so they are just amazing.my personal gentleman has been in his line of work for over 20 years he is a father of 4 and moved here years ago from Haiti. Everyone here loves him. He demeanor and his quiet and strong presence as he assists me so carefully.

 

They feel the peace and Serenity in this house and have been moved to tears. They too are reading the blog. We do not discuss faith a whole

My niece Stephanie is an active member in her faith and works very hard serving other people’s needs fundraisers and causes.She is a living doll. One day she put on her Facebook wall a tribute about me and my attitude of Graditude to God even during the tough days. The artist was Laura Story .i had not heard of her before but her songs and music have been such a comfort to me. You see God uses us all to help one another.

in in home hospice is about problem solving and stopping further injuries from falls etc. safety always first.

This is the song that Stephane sent to me the words are so correct for this life including mine too.

enjoy and God Bless You All.

U

 

I pray that today’s message helps someone Amen. Btw, my nieces and nephews are great in general. They shop, cook and ae constantly trying to keep our Spirits etc up I have one niece that makes the best egg plant know to man and spoils us with it after working hard days at work and commuting. One niece goes out and comes here with new clothes etc that she show for and gets great pricing. She never wants or takes anything either she is loving me/ us as family. Like I said. I am blessed and spoiled.

Have a beautiful day. God Bless You

Danny👍😀

Am I Afraid of death?

20 Tuesday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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Good morning all,

 

i mentioned yesterday that that today’s blog would be about a big question that I get as does everyone who is near the end of their Earthy journey.Are you afraid?

 

Let me me say this in this moment as I sit here no.  I need to say honestly that my life experience with this subject that I have had  personally has left me no doubt in this moment of Gods words and Jesus gift to us by taking any of our sins away by his passion upon the cross. This is again my opinion due to my Catholic faith. Another thing that I need to say is this my Catholic faith has never been considered one born out of guilt. I was not raised that way. My Cathoilc up bringing was not a God of hate anger and retrobution. If at sometimes someone went down that road in any environment our family structures our parents and my families grandparents resolved that mindset right away.They practiced what they preachedin Gods word word and we witnessed in action their service to others and the love of Jesus Christbe expressed  to otherswho needed love and support.  So, I am not a person with that mindset of God being a bully having a God who is going teach us a lesson. Think of yourself with your own children. They are not perfect either but we want what is best for them and will guide them in a way of love towards their goals.and towards a successful relationship with us as well.it is what good parenting does it brings about a happy and respectful sense of family.

I having said that have never been to the defining edge of death either so i have not experienced that life event as yet.

OurWith my different friends and family that I have been  honored to be with during that time and  that I was honored to be while I posed that question to the majority of them said they were a little nervous. A little fear of the unknown. They were not all Catholic but they were involved in some way with their own faith journeys. Many of these people as far as I am concerned were amongst the finest people that I knew and they still still had their own reservations . So, honestly why should I be any different? I know I trust God.iI have not gone and come with any revelations. back so I have no experience in that regard in way either. I know some faiths believe in reincarnation and I do now t despute anyone else’s personal beliefs. I do not have the answers. I am not a theologian nor do I understand many faiths right down to the root of them.For me as I always say in my belief by his Divine presence the fact that we are breathing thinking and that our planet is floating in his Universe and graviton is holding us all safely. Now, a God like that only has a one word discription. It is called love.

I selected this song because it is so perfect for anyone who may be preparing or heading to this life’s intersection. It is from the church music that we have and Jesus went before us as the only Divine human ever to walk this Earth. So hope is always  available as are the Miracles that are spoken about❌⭕️🙏🙏🙏👍😀❤️❤️❤️

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wQr4udSiEewi BTW, I have  friends even after watching my pretty miraculous journey who do not necessary believe in God and cannot figure out my faith. I have shared my faith for years with many of my friends to help to  them to find their own too. We are called to help one another. I never have pushed it onto anyone nor would I ever attempt to. I try to live the faith and not to brow beat anyone. Live the life, hope and faith that is your s.  As I always say and people notice and will wonder why you are at peace even in tough situation.

As I wrote in yesterday’s blog that my son Brad had passed away almost 28 years ago, I have teenage friends that were lost through different life evens including accidents, cancer car accidents suicide all life events that can happen. I have read and seen many documented after life experiences. Too many to discount for sure especially children but also professional doctors who were prior to never believers. dothers stories thinking that they were suffering effects of medications and perhaps oxygen deprivation. They changed their minds immediately when they experienced the white light and calling forward They saw their loved ones congregated and waiting.including pets. The little children. Their personal  accounts of their experiences speak of people that they never or new grandparents who had passed long before their birth sect. In one case in Heaven is for real. The small boy met a sister in Heaven who had was lost in pregancy

The family was shocked to hear his revelations and This is the scenario that I believe Gods promise of HeavenAnd it’s beauty and love is my hope to us . and it is my desired destination when it is my time. That’s when I and where I can see my mom , grandparents, my son, my friends and thE Holy Bible  says, eyes have not seen, ears have not heard the beauty of God? That’s my belief.and I sit here with peace that God gave me and I cannot imagine not having that peace it has been 5 years ago next Aprilduring my originaldiagnosis day the peace of God decended upon me and it has never left me. If and when anything changes with me my son Danny will update my blog and my Facebook page. I truly hope that this writing reaches someone that God wants it to to. I pray to God that my perhaps feeble attempt resonates. I can only say. God Bless You And if you need anything please visit my Facebook wall Daniel Riley the profile picture is myself and my beautiful wife Janet.

 

This is the original trailer of one of the movies that I saw and loved.

if you have not seen it I would suggest that you look it up its not really really a hard program to watch but the message is beautiful too.

 

 

 

My

 

i will say this also,

 

As a Follow Up to yesterday’s writing another very common phrase I am getting all the time which I totally understand is this…. We are going to miss you so much! What are we going to do when you when you are gone This is how we all feel when we become separated from those we love.so This is why I am attempting to pull this subject out of the shadows and bring light upon it. It’s natural and totally understandable. Everybody feels this way about loss even with a beloved pet. I know this having lost my baby pets? It is a question born out of love and out of a future longing because we all feel the effects of missing our beloved in our lives I mentioned yesterday in my writing about never wanting to let go ofthose you love, one more hug,one one more kiss. My life window has been described to me with this to be very short. And, my condition could change in a blink of an eye.Hense people are even are more nervous this time. I appreciate their love and I love them all too? I toohave said time and again to everyone in this blog that. I feel as the cancer patient to be in the easiest position here. I believe it is easier to go to God then to go through the period of a love loss. I know it may sound crazy but it is true. This is a common sentiment shared by a a whole lot of my friends. I have always thanked God if a demonic illness such as cancerhad to go after anyone I athat it was me and not my children or my Janet.T his is the song I woke upto in my mind after all of my recent conversations.The song sounds a little melancholy But, I feel the powerand beauty of the words and their meaning. It definitely brought be back nearly 28 years today to the ICU at Bostons Children’s Hospital when my son body Brad Michael was passed to me to hold after he passed from heart des ease at the age of 2 weeks old for The very last time nurses offered his little body to me hold and I almost could not bare the thought of holding his tiny little body of around 8 pounds. If it had not been for my Janet that day who encouraged me it may not have happened. My life and understanding of God was shattered at that moment as was Janet’s. Iwas horrific as we left the hospital as we left that hospital on a warm April afternoon. On our way home we heard on the news about the police were searching for someone who had left a baby to die in a dumpster it hit us like a ton of bricks as we watched the kids walking over the BUnbridge. Brad by the way is one of our life catalysts to bringus to our personal faith to where it is today. We started anew to discover our own relationship with God and Heaven. Our elder family members and family members in genera land those that God brought into our lives ought to help us as helpers in the faith has helped to heal me/ us over the years. Brad that April day was going down right away for organ donation which we have always been so happy that the hospital had were asked and that we said yes. Some other beautifulpeople were blessed with what they needed God knows! So, that’s what matters. I understand again the sentiment of this next song. MY NEXTtopic that I will write on tomorrow which needs to be addressed is, Am I afraid? I will honestly tackle that question tomorrow to the best of my ability it is a constant question that is presented to me and I have spoken to many other cancer patients and others who I have visited when their time was near to the end of their journeys. I would pray with them,or would bring the Holy Eucharist to them if they desired it. I would get clergy or whatever they desired. We spoke about any personal desire or anyone they wanted to speak to. It was about their wellbeing as they prepared to step forward to their next destiny based on their own faith and beliefs we are not all Roman Cathoilc and I totally appreciate that too.being so, I made sure that if God had me there that I did my part for themand their families I often spoke things to them that the family just could not. They were devastated that’s whyGod had me there. Remember, I am not a hospice worker. I am just me like you are just you. All loved the same by one Creator. God. I used to be nervous at times when I went in and I sat down with someone who I did not know too well including their families but I was there to help. No one knows where everyone is truly coming fromespecially in a high stress situation or from a position of despair. My blog tomorrowwillanswer will most assuredly be guided by the wisdom that they imparted to me as well. well. I again need to be honest on this blog we are all connected and need to support and love one another.It breaks my heart when people say what will I/ we do ? I understand that my passing likeanyone else’s changes a number of people’s universe.When I felt called out of the boat to begin to visit the sick and to reach out with calls and prayers I call it stepping out of the boat into the water After stepping out of the boat and trusting in God taking Jesus hand as Peter did I found a small scripture that allowed me to enter into the situation after my prayer. It read something like this… The will of God will never take you to a place where the grace of God does not protect you. Those few wpowerful words have allowed me such freedom and peace. You see my Holy Bible is my living and breathing words of God they are alive and well.?

19 Monday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

≈ 3 Comments

By my faiths nd personal experience I have found that we all will ll instinctively move on My mom always said when speaking with her Dan, no man is and island we just need to move on.I agree with this 100percent to my family in particular children, life is different but God is there for everyone so he will get through and eventually joy comes in and fills your life in a new and unexpected day. There will be beautiful life events that I plan on being with you all for. Love is the most important gift that God had given us that’s why we have the ability to cry and heal. This is the song that I woke up to this morning. I had my kindle on my Christmas station last night so this song was certainly not on any play list. God Bless you. In this moment I just got a little piece of scripture it was…. Be still and know that I am God. Thatis what I am doing right now quietly praying and working my blog with the guidance of the Holy Spirit of God simply this morning as Janet keeps everything here in Danny world good and in order. I will be hung over all of those I love in the sky as the song says and I will be praying  praying, honoring my God and watching over my family and friends. As, long as It is of my truth which is Heaven. I will find out and. I believe in my heart so I am grateful for everyday of life every person that helped me to get to this day with love and peace and joy and faith.Amen. Please look at the beauty of these words and don’t get hung up in any sadness. I have my prayer partner The Most Blessed Mother, My Heavenly Mother who I have asked to guide me in that moment. She is my protector on my journey like my Earthy mom was. My mom Roberta/ Bobby was simply the best. I have  never had adversity in this life truly. I have wanted for nothing ever. Even now. My grandparents, my parents, my family siblings,wife, friends and entire family network have set me up for success. God blessed me with it all so, all honor goes to God, Jesus Christ and his birth in  a humble stable and death upon the crossfire our sins.

I hope and pray that this writing will touch the heart of someone in need of this message everything is okay, believe, pray to your father in Heaven be still and know that he does in fact have you Amen. Love just me

love, just danny

The tenderness of each moment.Our hearts are so grateful.

17 Saturday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

≈ 5 Comments

We Good morning all Just Danny here. Sitting in my docking station per usual👍😀.

 

Another good night sleep and my Janetwas  buzzing  around me all nightlong  taking care of my needs. She is a doll. She is always propping my pillows making sure that my Christmas music is on low and does not shut off on me. You all know how much I love music any genre really. The word is getting out slowlyabout my health  but surely which increases the traffic to the house. But, we let people know the truths hat we need to minimize the length of visits and we watch not to have too much action here at one time. The hospice expletive know their stuff. They told us on the onset to leave time for family first that it was a necessity. With all 4 of my children and their different personalities that they need the time to get through this. I instinctively knew that because I too need them with me .My children Janet and my family are my very much a part of my physocolgical and emotional health.

This song that I love isfor  my beautiful Janet who woke me up early. Got me safely into the bath,  got my Meds and breakfast All the  while saying Danny look it’s snowing! She knew it was something I would like and that I did👍😀 . It made my morning ever better. I wake up every morning and we say the same thing after prayer… Janet says how do you feel? Do you still feel the same meaning pain symptoms etc. with her help I get out of bed and do my morning check list which I say Thankyou God no pain no headaches.all glory is his alone.

 

 

As I am writing this blog.. This song popped into my head and I searched it and found it . I have not heard it for years. The first note that my daughter heard she began to sing the song and knew the Artist. I was so happy I thought to myself are work raising our children with their faithhas really taken root. In this life the kids and everyone needs Ana Spiritual anchor and there is one God so why would you want to live in a world where your faith which is so important that you ignore it and are left with despair and hopelessness.

The silver lining of being given 5 years beyond my original diagnosis is that I have had time to take care of business that was important to myself and my family should the Time come.Not many get that we we did.

i have heard countless stories of people who go out to do an errand and never return. My mom ever n found  her mom who had died suddenly one day at her home and the sudden shock of her loss if of her effected her and our family for so long. My mom always said kids you love big, you lose big. She was always with her mom as were we as a family.Nana Ilene was a doll.

What I too truly new when my mom passed three years agonext Aug August  from cancer is that love is as she said selfish we never want to let go. Wewe all prayed as as a United family we were  in constant contact with her said every word that could ever have been said. Said we love you and Thankyou to her a million times and guess what there is always that desire for yet another kiss, another hug or another I love you.

We have been busy here amongst other things, we met with a Social worker through hospice to help us devise a plan for me to transfer from my home to a hospice facility when it is deemed necessary or when and if I am incapacitated and unable to even care about myself. My family wanted me here but I insisted that I wanted to be somewhere where I would receive full personal care of a professional staff and where my family would be supported as well. The family is my primary concern. That’s all thatieveryone I  really what I care about. I told my Janet as long as you all are happy then that’s all that all that matters.

We were fortunate our dear friend Deacon Paul from New York flew in last week to help us to get things together and to make sure that we could get some of the possible hiccups out of the way. So, again we were Blessed. You  will not hears  complaint about anything.

 

This is is the song that I mentioned above it is the silent acclimation in my heart

Jesus is carrying this entire family for ever.i know Jesus and my Heavely Father has me no matter what. I am without fear and worry not about tomorrow God has that too.

Keep smiling Thankyou for your continued prayers. You remain in our as well.

Love, justdanny and family.

Week 2 in home hospice.

15 Thursday Dec 2016

Posted by justdannyspeaks in Uncategorized

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I am glad to say that everything here continues to be well. This house is busy for sure. People in and out primarily family, nurses some friends and way too much foodlol🐖🐖🐖🐖The aides, nurses etc have been great. I still have had not one headache or pain in my skull despite the monster tumor in my head to which I thank God! I truly have not suffered or had the adversity that most peoplwho are in terminal terminal care. Most of my pain has been in the psychological area whereas I lost my personal identity and purpose for a while. But per yesterday’s writing I have gotten over that hump. I had my first bumpy night last night no pain but joint discomfort.

I know exactly what it is from its is as easy as 1plus 1 really.

Ia have literally gone from pushing myself through the day for well over 4.5 yea. Well 3 weeks ago when I became so weak that I could no longer go down the stairs safely.and could not walk and get up without struggle set into motion my bodies joint issues. I was told years ago by an orthopedicswhen I had broken my leg on ice and needed to have medical care.The  Doctorsaid  in order to maintain a body it has to move I remember him showing me his medical signage and showed me the composition of the body, skeletal, muscle, tendons and the elements of the bone, cartilage. He said Dan always walk because walking will allow your muscles to keep your tendons tight and will keep your joints tight. At that time I was a busy working dad and would literally run the stairwell 2-3 steps at a time. But with my work which included hanging my clients wall covering I truly loved that expression of installing something that dramatically changed an environment in a way that a lot of other design applications could not plus God gave me the ability to instal the mete rials at a very high level. My clients were thrilled I was proud and my client list just took off. So, again God was blessing me/and us as a family business. For the record My brother Bob was excellent too he was a faster hanger than me but always shot for perfection. I miss the Riley boy days as my clients called us it was a special time my parents were so proud of us all too. It was a dream for them to see us going after our dream together.

Back in th1990’s mid I began to have trouble with my right knee because I did a lot of stairwell drop sections I would sit ackwardly on a angle of the step to drop, smooth and trim the baseboard level of the wall covering. Sitting that way put a lot of pressure on the side of my knee to stay stable and to keep my knee in the joint properly. So, on a few occasions my knee became disjointed I got that oh God, this kills feeling and moved and the joint would pop back in . I had begun to weaken my joint so this became more common. One day I was working and kneeling and twisted my body and I totally tore my cartilage it was called a bucket tear. The joint could not Remove could not stand up, I could not walk the joint was totally blocked. I was taken from Arlington that day to Mt. Auburn and told that I needed surgery to memove the damaged cartilage that was crippling me.

 

. After surgery and time .i was as good as new and always kept active. Like the Doctor said that day once you lose your legs Dan all of the movement of your arms your core muscles for strength and stamina will be lost. That includes respiratory as well.so, what I am seeing as of last night for the first time is that my body is aching for movement. That Dr’s little talk years ago set into my reality that we are a strong yet fragile body. That needs to be tuned. By pushing myself after that time and walking the beautiful lake here doing loops and the new tracks herein Wakefield, and in Winchester I have been able to keep my body moving and pain free. I love walking. I currently cannot but I am hoping to down the line. I waould love to walk the lake with Janet as we used to do hand and hand and we would just talk about whatever. Those are the moments that inspire me to move along. I would also love to see a grandchild if it is Gods will and be down the lake to watch the baby play as my kids did. I know I have no personal control over anything. I can only say this. I have been here for far longer than and Dr. Said I would be and still feel really great aside from exhaustion. I believe that everything is possible through God. I am living in his will today, and plan on staying there too. Peace is flowing like a river.Amen

so, if you are living a life stuck in a chair or just do not feel great. Get a friend , get up and go safely off to envigorate your mind body and Spirit. It will change your day and perhaps your life too.

 

God Bless you all, Keep the faith, your hope and your zest for life too.

 

i actually began this blog a few days ago and since myorginal part spoke of my joints bothering me. I got up and did just general movement again to try and prove my educated guess based on my Dr, orthopedics from the 1990’s I moved around my first floor hallway with my cane and family and got a bit of exercise.it worked and I slept like a baby and my joints feel better. I had my personal care attendant here today and will walk my halls in a short while with my family and my cane. So, my suggestion if your feeling ache and tried from sleeping and laying down get some assistance and a buddy and get moving !❌⭕️👍❤️.

 

whats even more impressive is this. That I have always marveled at the fact that God has made us so strong that even though we can get sick but we are able to receive chemo and radiative treatment at a high level. And even though I am on in home hospice once I got pain from lack of moment the little bit of work that I have done my body accepted it and reacted by strengthening up more.Now, that’s another MiracleAll of my friends with cancer, depression whatever are always told by me to get up and get going in sitting we create ruts, depression and despair movement is life. Especially outside in nature the smells the sights and the sounds. I have had a lot of friends over the years who joined walking clubs in the malls. It became a motivational safe and dry destination to meet friends and to excerise in a safe weathertight location. No ice etc.

Another great option.

 

Just keep your your self positive, hopeful and move forward towards your new tomorrow it’s waiting. Plus, you may inspire someone else that you love too towards a better path.

 

With love,

 

just found this this song today for the blog and put it onto my Facebook wall as well. All is well. Gods got this!

 

 

 

 

Love, Just danny

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